Writing to no one

In my years of being me, I have never truly written anything for the audience. Whenever I do write it is for myself. The words that need to get out, that cannot be told to a person "in person". Once upon a time I wrote periodically in a journal - letters to my now husband, that never were to be read.

Writing for the sake of writing, a condition also known as graphomania.

I have to admit that after years of writing consistently, then there came years of not writing a single word. Even writing an email had been a chore at that time. And here I am. Again - writing for the sake of just getting it out. Such writing has no value, no sense and no message. I'm not documenting our lives, I'm not expressing any revolutionary thoughts, I'm not trying to change the world. It is hard for me to understand how I can even justify spending my time like this. But then, I remember why I'm here. When you have no one to talk to, you may end up just talking to the sheet of paper, or in this specific case - to a blank web page.